Women: what do you think would make you (and other women) more likely to visit this site?

[Ballistic]

Once upon a time, there were more females who visited this site regularly, IMO. I feel like the F/M ratio has plummeted over the past few years, at least with regards to live chat. I am wondering if those who used to visit more frequently might have some thoughts as to how this can be improved. After all, without you, there isn't much point.

[Pointy Toe Pumps]

I don't bother trying to chat with the gals. It's too comptetive. Mind you - I think it would be a blast. Someday maybe I will have the pleasure of engaging one of the unique gals who visit the site.

[Rooomer]

Let me add another question for the women.  I do reach out to women to chat (always politely IMO, but if any women here disagree, feel free to call me out).  

I recognize that you are likely inundate with chat windows so when there's no response, I don't take it personally.  But I might reach out again if see that person online a few days later.  So my question is: when does that kind of follow-up feel more like pestering?  (FWIW, a quick "hey- not up for chatting" is something I, and I hope a lot of the other guys, would respect).

[April Castro]

Hello Rooomer,

How are you? "So my question is: when does that kind of follow-up feel more like pestering?" It becomes a vexation when, a woman responds (in a tactful way) that she does not possess the time or inclination. I have had individuals send me numerous 'add as a friend' requests. Even after, sending a message I do not have the time (or interest) to correspond with them re; the ball busting fetish.

April

[Rooomer]

Hi April,

Thanks for the response.  If someone tells me they don't want to chat (today or ever) then I definitely respect that. I've only sent friend requests to people I've connected with on chat and don't repeatedly ping them.

The situation I'm referring to is when a chat goes unanswered.  It could be a passive-aggressive "not interested" or just the reality of getting bombarded by chat requests.  So I'll usually try again when I see them online later.  If people don't want to chat, there's no harm in a quick reply that says you're not up for it.

Hope that helps explain my question.

[tsm89]

Rooomer hit it on the head (choose to make it a pun if you so desire), I don't take any offense to no responses but I will assume you are just busy and I will reach out again later. But if you just don't want to chat with me, no hard feelings at all, I'm completely ok with getting a response like "hey don't feel feel like chatting". That is cool beans, and I'd encourage other guys here to share this attitude.

[OneBalledBoy]

I agree with what Rooomer says: a "not up for chatting" response would be polite and maybe it might cut down on the number of chat requests.

However, having chatted with a few females here and earlier at Kramtoad, the whole interface is really unwieldy. The girls get lots of chat windows popping open all the time and it is hard to keep track of them all, even if they like to chat with multiple guys at the same time. Clicking 'Ignore' is probably the easiest way to cut down on the number of chats and to concentrate on a few.

Also, one can click on 'Options' in the far right bottom corner and disable the chat feature all together by unchecking 'Connected to chat'. That way one can read the site without distractions. ;-)

For some reason it was easier to chat on Kramtoad. Maybe that is because people would tend to chat more in the common area, instead of in private chats?

[Melinda the Ball Breaker]

I know that I try to accommodate everyone who tires to chat with me, which can be literally up to 10-12 people at a time. It can get really confusing at times and I can only really keep so many conversations going at once. Honestly it also depends on who and what I'm talking about. I can get into some really intense conversations on here, that is why I love it. I'm sorry but it seems most guys just want me to tell them what I would do to them. it makes it hard to start up a conversation with you. If don't responded it's because I'm busy or already deep into chatting with someone else. Sometimes it matter of getting my attention. Rooomer no that isn't pestering to me, sometimes I really want to talk to someone but never really get the chance. Pointy toe, that's sad because there have been days I have come on and no one is really chatting with because most just assume the same thing; I won't answer, I do try my best. This is why I am always telling people to send me a message if you really want to talk to me. Let me know, you would surprised of how many legit questions I get.